Sunday, 6 March 2011

A Watched Pot Never Boils

"Oi! Wendy!

Why is it that the blokes I fancy never fancy me back?
And the only ones who fancy me are massive pricks or have faces like the back end of a bus?
How's that for a bloody pain in the arse problem?!

Hey? HEY?
Yeah! Put that in your problem pipe and smoke it, you big mouthed amphibian!

'I'm not desperate - nor have I just had 3 bottles of coke. I just like talking like this sometimes... *cough*'"

Hello Miss I'm Not Desperate (Honest).

Ok, first, I think we're going to have to calm down! Because, let's face it darling, you're going to have a hard time convincing blokes to fancy you if you appear mentally deranged.

But you're right. It's ALWAYS the problem. Sally likes Mike, who likes Lisa, who likes Adrian, who likes Mary, who likes Paul, who likes Sally. And no one ends up together! I honestly don't know why the world is like that, I have no answer for that. But that's the way it is.

But occasionally, occasionally, it all works out. A guy sees a girl in a crowd, and for reasons that the best scientists have no explaniation for, he thinks, I want that one. And the girl looks back and thinks, yes, that's the guy for me. Sometimes no one else can see why she chooses him, or he chooses her, but that's just one of the mysteries of life!

And here's the thing. It doesn't have to happen all that often. People aren't mutually attracted all the time. Otherwise we'd have a terrible time trying to live our lives, we'd be off dating constantly! It only needs to happen once every so often for something to grow out of it, and if that something turns out to be THE thing, that lasts forever, you'll find yourself remembering all the unrequited loves you used to have, and wondering why on earth you pined over them, because THIS, this much better thing, was waiting all along!

And you know I'm telling the truth, because you've seen it. You've seen people who have had no luck in love suddenly find "the one" and live happily ever after. And it's going to happen to you.

I repeat, it's going to happen. And I'm not saying that because I'm a positive thinker, or because I believe in soul mates, or destiny, or THE ALMIGHTY POWERS OF TRUE LOVE CONQUERING ALL. I'm saying it because most people do fall in love and live happily ever after, at some point. And I believe in statistics, and the law of averages.

So it will happen, you'll find that guy you're crazy about who likes you just as much. But remember, a watched pot never boils, so stop looking for him! Stop waiting and pining, and get out there and enjoy being free and single as much as possible while you still can!

And maybe lay off the caffeinated drinks a little bit.

Much love,

The Very Rational Wendy.

What an angry lady!
If you would also like to vent at me, or even better tell me how fabulous I am, or in fact ask me a question (preferably with a relationshipy theme) email me at

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